Always be prepared to do undertaking in first-class style.
That’s a mantra. Way better than Metallica’s “My lifestyle determines my death style” line, which makes me laugh just thinking about it.
Well la-di-da…
The Crying of Label 139
If you want to travel affordably with a real potential for adventure, you could do worse than waiting until you’re ashes – and get an insider view of the US Postal Service in the process. This opportunity could be yours with the purchase of Label 139. Cremated Remains.
(“Label 139” is a great name for a goth record label)
Amid covid and general changes in attitude, cremation (and the shipping of created cremains), has become much more common. Common enough that the USPS has had trouble keeping up with demands for the packaging.
USPS’s guide explains that the ashes must be packed in a “sift-proof container” – lest you risk having an inadvertent Aerial Scattering, the technical term for throwing ashes from a plane. Also, my second entry into the “death terms that should be band names by now”
As for adventure, there probably won’t be any. But you never know! The podcast Last Seen has an episode about the very roundabout journey one particular urn took.
It’s a great listen, no doubt because it’s a fascinating mystery. But it also shows how personal and biased we can be when it comes to the remembrance and memorializing. Every culture, every family, every person has a unique way of confronting grief and loss. And each person has their own idea of how they want to be remembered.
We rarely have control over our own memories, so it’s quite audacious to believe we can control others’… but we always try.
Man is a noble animal, splendid in ashes, and pompous in the grave.
Sir Thomas Browne
Non Curo
The Romans could have some fun with an epitaph.
This memorial was made for Marcus Caecilius.
Thank you, my dear guest, for stopping at my abode.
Good luck and good health to you. Sleep without a care.
Gravestone pictured above, c. 140 BCE
Isn’t that sweet?
A lot of Roman graves want to pull aside the living and give them a bit of insight. That insight being – “thanks for swinging by my grave – now go enjoy living!”
It’s an Epicurean approach – which isn’t the hedonistic free-for-all we’ve been lead to believe. It did prioritize pleasure, but in a much more mindful way – finding joy in the simple life. Not forever struggling and competing, but appreciating the only thing you really have – this life at this moment.
Hence the NFFNSNC vibe.
No? Not terribly catchy, but it stands for “Non Fui, Fui, Non Sum, Non Curo”
“I was not, I was, I am not, I care not.”
Supposedly the words of Epicurus, though probably not quite exact, as he was a Greek fella who spoke in, well, Greek.
Imagine, next time you’re strolling through a graveyard or cemetery, that every tombstone there is saying, “Hey – thanks for visiting, but don’t forget to go live!” Not a bad way to honor both the departed and the living. Because you will “non cura” once you’re gone.
And if you can’t afford a nice tomb to affix your epitaph, a bit of graffiti can do the trick:
Cradle to Grave. Crib to Tomb.
“Take a look in, as you go by.”
B. W. Hooker & Co. – Undertakers (c. 1900)
Death Becomes You 